If She Only Knew

Katherine awoke to the sound of Ed Sheeran’s “I See Fire” coming from the phone on her nightstand. She rolled over to check the number, which read unknown. She never answered unknowns. She heard the voicemail tone, deciding to check it later. Katherine fell back asleep.

A couple of hours later, she started her day. She decided to listen to the message.

“Hey Kat, it’s your old friend 6MP here. You know, the chemo drug you were on. Sorry, I turned toxic on you in the spring. I know it’s been about five months since we stopped seeing each other, but there are some things I forgot to mention to you when we split. As you purge me from your system, you will experience some… side effects.

First, some sort of good news! All the hair you lost, it’ll start to grow back! But it’ll come in super curly. If you can find a way to manage it, I think it’ll look adorbs! Might even look like Merida! If you can’t tame it, good luck because you will look like Hagrid. Also, those 14” you donated last year? You’re never getting them back. Have fun with shoulder-length hair!

Now about your skin. You are going to break out like a teenager on picture day. And anything you do to try and fight it will just make it worse. Totes, my bad! Bright side, people will think you are younger than you are! Sorry, I know that isn’t helping.

Let’s see what else. Oh, your joints! They are going to swell something fierce. I mean puffy to the point of visibility. Making a fist, that’s not going to happen. Oops!

I’d like to tell you I had some awesome news about your Crohn’s disease, but I don’t. I may have put it into remission, but it will not stay that way. And it is going to suck! Again, totes my bad.

Lastly, you will show high liver counts for a good six months. It’s just me working my way out of your system. It’s no big deal, so don’t freak out or go crazy doing many tests to figure out the cause. It’s just me.

So, yeah, I’m sorry. I probably should have mentioned this when I last saw you. Hope your summer was a good one! Take care!”

She hung up the phone, sighing. Most of this was not new information to her as she had spent the entire summer fighting breakouts, unruly curls, and swollen joints. She was also well aware the Crohn’s was out of remission. It returned, kicking and screaming all up and down her abdomen. The worst part was the massive number of tests and medication changes she had to make to figure out why her liver counts would not normalize. It had been a miserable five months trying to come off the 6MP. She could have been better prepared if she had just had a small glimpse of what was to come. She wouldn’t have had to cancel plans with her friends or sell tickets to events she had. She wouldn’t have been stuck in bed watching the summer days pass her by. If she only knew…

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Author Note: Originally published November 9, 2014